Forgiveness often happens mindlessly in most relationships.
Being late home, not doing the laundry, getting drunk, making fools of themselves at parties – are all mindlessly forgiven. No effort involved normally, just give it a week or two and hey presto forgiven; probably not forgotten though.
Sometimes however there is such a major breach of trust that it is not so easily forgiven.
All of a sudden, forgiveness is being thought about. It changes from mindless forgiveness to more mindful, hard-work, forgiveness.
Mindful forgiveness is something we are not as experienced in, and leads us to ask questions like: “How do I forgive?” and “How do I move on?”.
Here are some thoughts to help you as you ponder the whole concept of forgiveness:
- What does forgiveness mean to me?
- Who am I forgiving and why?
- If I forgive what benefit will there be? What are the detrimental aspects of forgiving?
- Have I ever been forgiven? What was that like?
- What rule has been broken this time that is so unacceptable to me?
Clinical Psychologist Dr David Wells has written an excellent article about Mindful Forgiveness. Why not take a few moments to read through it now?